Episode 12: Teach them to Fight
welcome to Season 2!
Engaging, challenging, and empowering parents in raising well-rounded children through combining educational research to everyday life.
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on today’s episode…
Does your child know “how to fight?” And no… I don’t mean throwing punches because every human knows how to do that! I’m talking about healthy conflict resolution!
insights
Outline
Healthy conflict resolution is always the best option, but not everyone knows how to do that.
The BEST marriage lesson Josh and I learned was… to learn how to fight.
We learned what healthy conflict resolution looked like for us. We learned about our own needs.
As a mom to 3 boys, there’s very little in my life that is ever quiet, not smelly, or not competitive. To avoid tears, drama (punches), but most importantly, to teach them to fight (aka, healthy conflict resolution), I teach the boys to consider their own needs as well as others during conflict.
3 WAYS TO TEACH THEM ABOUT HEALTHY CONFLICT RESOLUTION (Modify as needed for the age groups)
Observe your child
Ex: become the “expert”Teach them to handle their emotions
Ex: Tears are for physical pain (aka blood) or emotional pain (heart). But crying because you can’t figure out a toy or the math problem, then that’s not ok. Communicating those needs, however, are!Introduce personality differences
Ex: Introverts or extroverts. Life of the party or homebody. Loud or quiet. Aggressive or gentle. A problem-solver… internally or externally?!
Outro
My 11-year-old used the term “passive aggressive” correctly last week. At me… busted! But I was also super proud!!
When kids are given the opportunity to digest new information with you, their #1 teacher, in their safe space, they begin welcoming new challenges, as their curiosity, competence, and confidence flourishes… making them lifelong learners.
